Nar3: Japan

Sugar Rush
Posted on Wednesday, April 7th, 2004 at 9:25am by Brett.
(Wednesday, April 7th, 2004 at 10:25pm Japanese Standard Time)

Imagine there was a little boy. A fat, hungry little boy, if you will. This boy was given a crisp, clean new dollar bill as a reward for good behavior for an entire week. His mommy told him that because he was such a good little boy, she would take him to the local candy store, where he could use the dollar to buy any candy he wanted. The local candy store was a sight to see...It was the second largest candy store in the entire country, and had all the candy any fat, hungry little boys could ever want.

On the way to candy store, the boy told him mommy that he would like to have a Snickers. He had always liked Snickers, and knew that he would like the one he would buy today.

When he and his mommy arrived at the candy store, the little boy looked around in awe. Though he had been to the candy store many times, it always amazed him. Then he saw the shiny plastic wrapping of a Snickers bar reflecting the sunlight. The Snickers bar was on a shelf far above little boy's head. He was looking up to the shelf, when something flashed in the corner of his eye.

He turned around and saw, across the store (which was quite a way...second largest in the country!) a display full of M&Ms. There were all kinds of M&Ms...normal chocolate ones, ones with nuts, and ones peanut butter. The little boy licked his lips, and started across the store to the M&M display.

As he waddled his way along, nearly reaching his goal, suddenly, as though from nowhere, there appeared a new shelf FULL of Reese's Pieces. He looked at them suspiciously at first. Reese's Pieces are a little less common, but still delicious and sweet. He picked up a package of the Reese's Pieces, but was still looking at the M&Ms, which were now nearly hidden behind the Reese's Pieces shelf.

He claimed his prize of Reese's Pieces, but continued toward the M&M display. When he got there, he picked up a bag of chocolate M&Ms.

Just then, his mommy came over to him and asked him which he wanted. He told her that he wanted both, but she reminded him that the dollar he had would only buy one kind of candy.

The boy's upper lip started to quiver; his eyes filled with tears. He had been such a good boy for so long. Surely he would be able to get both candies. He asked him mommy for an extra dollar, but she hadn't brought her purse. She told him that if he chose one candy now, the next week, if he was good, she would bring him back, and he could chose another.

A week to a toddler is, after all, an eternity. The little boy blinked his eyes sloppily as large tears tumbled to the ground. Still holding both candies, the little boy saw the Snickers glistening in the sun...shining and winking at him from far, far across the store.


This is me in my academic life. I knew in highschool that when I arrived at the OSU Candy Store, I would be going for the Snickers of Computer Science. Somewhere along the line, the M&Ms of Music Education attracted my attention, and I headed off in that direction...not forgetting Computer Science, but definitely turning my back to it.

Then--now--comes the Reese's Pieces of Japanese. An odd, less common major, but not without its merits...the biggest one being that I just found out that I'll be able to graduate with a Japanese Major at least a YEAR before I'll be able to graduate with a Music Ed degree...more likely a year and a half...

Now, I have been tempted by other majors...it doesn't end there. I was seduced by the Skittles of Psychology...who isn't? I've looked at the Lollipops of Linguistics, was interested in the Chocolate Eclairs of English, and even taste tested the Twix of Theatre...

The Kit Kat of Communication Science are bite-sized and easy to eat, but not quite as tasty as its brother, the Big Kat of Journalism.

I just want to do too much at once, it seems. I'm going to be one of those weird old men who owns his own race horse, is a retired highschool chemistry teacher (but is currently working at as a driver for the EMS), and gives scuba diving lessons in Mexico during July.

I honestly wouldn't mind staying in school for the rest of my life...well, that is if there were no tests...and it was free...and if there was no homework...and I could still have a decent job to pay for my house...hrm...

I may need to rethink this.

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4 Comments for this post.
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Funny by Pete [2004/10/04 09:43 ET]
Brett, your moms comment made me laugh :D
mom... by Brett [2004/07/04 22:46 ET]
Whoa, boys!! by mom [2004/07/04 18:29 ET]
First of all, what's this about owning race hores? I always thought that hores began with a "W", (but I never experienced the Chocolate Eclairs of Engish), and I didn't know they raced. Race doing what? uhhh, never mind.

But I'll tell you what, since the little boy wants another dollar to get other candy, maybe he should think about which candy will make him the fattest.

Nice story though.
and if you eat all that candy? by josh [2004/07/04 14:15 ET]
You will probably end up with a terrible tummy ache.

But seriouslly, I know exactly how you feel.

At one point, I remember looking through through
the graduation requirements and realizing that I
was only a few classes away from a japanese minor,
2 or 3 from a math minor, etc...
It is very tempting....

Are you really that close to a japanese major?
Could you graduate by spring 2005?
I suspect (from my own experience) that it would
probably take you close to 3 more years to finish
a cs degree.

I assume that even if you were fully focused on
getting a japanese major that there would only
be a few classes that you could take each quarter
that would count towards that major. Perhaps
you could also knock out some calc classes during
that time. You could then start on a CS masters.
Since it should only take 2 years to get a masters,
and assumeing that you could finish you japanese
bs in a year, you could have a japanese bs + cs masters
in the time it would take you to get a cs bs.

One big advantage of doing things this way, is that
working on a masters would open you up to a whole
new world of financial aid. Also, you could be
a TA if you were a grad student, which would further
reduce costs. Oh, and once you hit 25 (or sooner if you
were claiming yourself on taxes) your pell grant will
go through the roof. I am not sure how long you can
get a pell grant, but I was still getting it my
last year.

So anyways, happy to spread some more candy out
on the table for you.